*depression* *depression* being failing a lot of things lately...first, there's my piano exam....=.= failed my grade 8 piano examination...for the 2nd time. second, i fail to attend my confirmation, which is kind of disappointing for my mom and dad, because i spend 2 years preparing for it, now it turned into nothing, and i had to wait for next year to get confirm with my juniors....third, just got the result for my trial exam for SPM(an exam similar to the O levels), hah, and guess what, i only got 2 A, which is maths and moral....all this are so depressing...TT.TT
i got 9G for my chemistry!!! gosh! and 8E for both biology and physics....man...i am so dead...oh wait, i am already! not to mention, next week would be the real exam....and i don't even think i am prepared for it yet....man...tell me...what am i gonna do....and mom and dad had been giving me 'career talk'. they kept asking : what do you want to do ? are you going to college ? are you going to work or bla bla bla....i just couldn't answer their question
and i've been thinking lately, i felt that this world is kind of exam orientated...well, at least in where i live...so, when i thought that this exam is nothing, i kind of feel relax, which makes me feel guilty because i couldn't and shouldn't feel relax in this time...i should be nervous, like all my friends were....because i sort of think that feeling relax is inappropriate....i know...(silly me)....but yea, the worse thing is, when i got my result next year, i don't want to feel guilty for being too relax before my exam...if you know what i mean...hahah